Here let me scratch that

"Currently unavailable" from Amazon comes this sweet Zombie Back Scratcher.  Ideal for groping or picking boogers with cuz I am that matureWho needs a friend or family member or ever those little metal scratchers when you have a creepy hand to do it for you.

I also think this would scare people if I forgot it laying out. "OH sorry Grandma! Here let me get your heart started again with some CPR."